lessons I learned in college

I learned hindsight is always twenty-twenty minutes too late
I learned that Starbucks specials can make you sedate and relate to a lesson
I learned in school -- namely how to cut corners en route to B.A. diplomas
I learned how to walk, talk, and think
and forgot it all after my seventh drink
I learned that T.V. is addictive because of Law & Order detectives
I learned to detect misplaced modifiers and
I learned to replace slang with satire my homeboy Anthony Burgess can admire
I learned there are no limits to inertia
I learned how to play by the rules and to swallow losing
and shortly after I learned how to cheat and think on my feet
I learned music notes that I can't really use
I learned about drugs that I tend to abuse
I learned unique and I learned the trend
I'm learning right now how this poem should end.